Heal me Today

It’s been a while since my last post. Honestly, this entire summer felt like I was living in a bit of a haze—a mix of stress, sadness, everyday responsibilities, and just trying to process my new reality.

During the school year, I didn’t feel it as intensely when my daughter was with her dad. But this summer, with our schedule split into two-week blocks, it felt incredibly strange not to see her for such long stretches of time. We stayed in touch a little, but since I’m trying to be the reasonable and respectful parent, I wanted to honor the time she had with him. She had a great time, and frankly, that’s all I really need to know.

She also had a brand new experience this summer—she went to a summer camp with her best friend and absolutely loved it! I’m pretty sure this will become a yearly tradition for as long as she’s old enough to go. As for the two of us, we spent an amazing holiday in Spain and enjoyed every minute of it.

This year has been full of travel for us, which I’m thrilled about, even if my wallet is quietly weeping. We’ve even started joking that we need to find a sponsor to fund all our travel adventures—and trust me, there are plenty of them! In fact, we’re heading to Paris very soon, but more on that later.

Looking back, this summer was wonderful in many ways, yet so strange in its dynamics. I’m still not used to dividing my time.

How about you? How do you cope with the time you can’t spend with your kids?

To be completely honest, some days are great. I finally have time for myself, I can do whatever my heart desires, and I try to make the most of it. I know many parents don’t have the luxury of “me time.” But after the joy of focusing on myself, those strange, empty moments always creep in—the moments when I just want to hug her, see her face, or hear her voice.

Yes, I know I can call her anytime, but as I mentioned, I try to respect her time with her dad and not intrude. I just wish we both approached it the same way… but that’s a completely different (and not very positive) story.

I would love it if you shared your experiences in the comments. As for me, even though I’m deeply grateful for the time I get for myself, my heart aches a little when she’s not home.